He Said, She Said
11:41 PM - Friday, May 29, 2009
SO once again, I'm swinging like a pendulum back and forth, don't people think it's fun to just lift up one end of the pendulum and let go, so that the balls all transfer their energy to the next one. They get loads of joy just watching it go back and forth, back and forth don't they..
Oh well, not that I have much choice in the matter, after all, I practically jumped straight in and volunteered to be the ball, in order to help someone, my hero/heroine complex needs to be dealt with ASAP.. -.-
Moving on.....
Let's talk about the events of this week!
Monday: Basically uneventful except for my getting back my Maths test results, and as predicted, I aced it with a score of 21/25, numbers I have not seen in like literally, EONS... =D And then I skipped Mass PE to go see doctor and do my blood test to check if I have thyroid.. =/ And came back to school for PW meeting, only to find they've cancelled it.. -.-
Tuesday: SUPER SUPER SIAN day.. Haiz, the only interesting thing was being able to reschedule my tuition! hehehe.. And then there's the very very nice long talk I had with Mrs Koh, I need to talk to her more often I swear, IT'S EXTREMELY THERAPEUTIC.. and I find out all sorts of things about the school.. =/
Wednesday: I got back my Econs test, also as predicted, really really bad.. But I got more than my predicted 1 mark! =X Then the rest of the day just passed like that.. =O No ISAC though, and I was really really sad, but then again, have to MUG for GP test right? haha.. I asked all the seniors for advice and of all, Junwei's one was the least helpful but most enticing ----> DON'T STUDY LUH!! hahaha.. thanks to all seniors who helped me out with their little tips and to everyone who wished me luck!
Thursday: GP COMMON TEST DAY!! Actually, it was ok leh! I chose my question really quickly, thank god for KS BULL!! hahaha.. and finished with 20 mins to spare! And I actually fell asleep!! OMG!! Oh and I suspect Gilbert Lee was worried that I fell asleep without finishing cos' he kept coughing around me.. =D And then on to comprehension, where I thought the passage was understandable, the compre was doable, AQ was =S Annabel promises to treat me if I do well, so TEACHERS!! Please spare a thought for my stomach! hahaha.. then I went with Amanda to print the posters, it's gonna be delivered to school on Monday! Hopefully, it comes out nice.. =))
Friday: Went to see doctor in the morning during my free periods, NO THYROID THANK GOODNESS but have referral letter to see someone in SGH due to the fact that my neck technically should not be swollen for no reason... =/ Econs was plain -.- PW was plain @.@ FPSP was >.< class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: bold;">is <3
Saturday: M&D gonna go to HK until Tuesday, leaving us 3 behind... =X Then I have tuition@1030, may need to go Open House after that, then go buy flowers, then go Dance Concert.
Sunday: Nothing on tentatively, but I wanna return library books and I think I have to clean the house.. HAIZ... =/
Oh well, so that was my week/that's my plan for the week, more stuff I need to talk about, but I think this is one insanely long post already.. So, maybe I'll blog again after this or I'll blog tmr or something like that.. Shall post my schedule for the holidays next.. *_*
ASEAN IS IN 5 DAYS!!
This is my time to shine, this is my time to find
All that I have inside, I never knew
10 Days to ASEAN =D
2:56 PM - Sunday, May 24, 2009
Hey guys,
I haven been able to blog for a while, been insanely busy! =/
Had like a gazillion tests last week: Econs, Maths and Geog =O
Of the 3, I'm pretty sure I aced Maths, failed Econs and passed Geog. Funny how things turn out, last year, I was totally more confident of passing Geog than I was of Maths, in fact, Maths was a confirm+chop FAIL. Oh well, just like the position papers, I have one below average, one average and one above average.. HAHAHA..
Speaking of Position Papers, I've marked my share of them already (except for UK, cos it hasn't come in yet). AND I managed to switch Amanda's paper with Steffi =), cos it really wouldn't be fair to Amanda, seeing as I know where she got her info from and all =S
OK, blog post from here is gonna be super random, but I'm just gonna target issues that have happened this week.
1. I BOUGHT MY ULTRA RED BLOUSE FROM G2000!! It's so freaking nice and RED!!! =)))
2. DASH TO MACS WILL GO DOWN IN HISTORY!!! It was so darn funny and crazy!! I love our ARCGIS group! =D
3. I'm down with flu... =((
4. I might have thyroid.. EEK.. pray for me people..
5. ISAC is really the only thing keeping me SANE.. =/ I need more ISAC sessions!!
6. ASEAN+ Summit is in like.. 10 days! I sincerely hope I dun screw up during the summit =/
7. ALICIA's Birthday was like 2 days ago, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAL/PIG/DEAR!!
I really really miss her.. =/ I wanna be able to have lunches with her and talk to her about SDSC cos she's the only one that truly understands.. =/
Oh well, on another random note, Geog CBD Delimiting was really really tiring but I love my group.. haha.. we are such weird funny people.. and of course, MRS BOK OWES US AN OSIM USQUEEZE EACH!!
And so we ask ourselves why....
8:41 PM - Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Some puns to start off this post...
1. A backwards poet writes inverse.
2. If a lawyer can be disbarred can a musician be denoted or a model deposed?
3. Some people don't like food going to waist.. (WOMAN!!)
4. There was once a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control his pupils.. =D
5. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat minor... XD
6. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion..
7. Every calendar's days are numbered...
I really really like the last one... hahaha.. cos it tells me what I already know.. Haiz.. I'm running out of time.. ASEAN+ is coming.. 3-6 june.. And before I even think about that glorious period called June Hols, I have to think of tests first.. Oh gods.. So many tests before june hols.. INCLUDING GP COMMON TEST... X_X
Tmr have ISAC!! =))) LOVES!! <3 hahahah.. I keep thinking if school was only made out of Wednesdays, it would be like heaven.. =)))
haiz.. loads of things to sort out, to think about, problems to solve, problems to anticipate.. Let's get started.. =S
Round round and round we go,
when it stops you say you don't know
Will I ever be enough?
10:09 PM - Monday, May 11, 2009
Yeah.. Will I ever be enough?? That's a darn good question.. It's one I believe we ask ourselves constantly..
1. Will I ever be enough as a friend?
2. Will I ever be enough as a daughter/son?
3. Will I ever be enough as a brother/sister?
4. Will I ever be enough as a student?
5. Will I ever be enough as a mother/father?
6. Will I ever be enough as a human being?
And endless variations ensue.. In my opinion, the last question encompasses every single variation. We are all human beings (except for Amanda maybe), and everything we do in life is to prove that we were worthy to be given a chance to be on this Earth, to have a life, to live out our days.
I just read the woman's blog and she said that she worries about not having any direction in life. Well, it's a topic that randomly but often comes up in our discussions/chats. I personally feel that I have found my direction in life ----> VOLUNTEERING and living life with passion for what I love.
I also think that having direction in life defines us, it gives us purpose, gives us a sense of what to do, this direction (be it north, south, east, west, inside and outside) will define our actions and guide our thoughts. And we are judged by our actions and thoughts, are we not?
Take for example my decision to join the 2008 Raffles Model United Nations (RMUN) because of my love of debates and current affairs, if I had not joined it, would I have realised how much I loved MUNs? Would I then had to struggle with the decision to take up CSC or ISAC as my first CCA? Would I have sat down and earnestly thought out the next step into my senior high life? By choosing to join ISAC, knowing that JC is a time for trying out new things, I have chosen to let CSC take a backseat. But as Ms Tan herself said, she knows that I won't let my decision slow me down in terms of my volunteering work. True enough, I haven't.
By struggling within myself, I found that my passion for Volunteering and Community Service was so strong that even if I took up something else, this passion would continue to BURN.. By struggling within myself, I found out that Ms Tan and Mrs Koh had actually foresaw this day, and were ready with an answer for me, that they trusted and believed in me, that all they wanted was for me to be happy. By struggling within myself, I emerged with an even stronger interest in ISAC than before, sure of my choice and thus willing to do anything for it.
Whether or not others see this all the same way as I do, I believe that because I have this particular direction in life, others do not see me as one who is merely doing volunteer work for the hours, but rather see me as one who truly believes in what she is doing. Like Jodie said:"you're like the person with the most burning passion I know", haha.. I'm glad that what I have done has made an impact on her, inspired her to throw herself into volunteer work more (hopefully). And so at the end of the day, when the time comes for me to judge whether I was worthy to be on this Earth, I hope that I can say with conviction "YES, THAT WAS A DARN GOOD DECISION OF YOURS." =D
For in life, one is not judged by the breadth or length of one's life, but one is judged by the DEPTH of which one has lived. =)
What goes around comes around...
10:23 PM - Sunday, May 10, 2009
Well.. After taking advice from loads of people.. and my 8 ball ^.^, I decided to just apply for Secretary General and Deputy Secretary General, who cares what my head thinks... =/ I think I'll most likely regret if I didn't even apply and try.. So, let's just wait and see how.. Hope I get a chance! =))
Next up was Econs project.. OMGOSH I did up the report and the ppt and we actually finished it!! First time I slept at 2am for 3 nights in a row.. and I basically died the whole of that week, but at least LSB said she "liked" our ppt.. XD even though we had no ECONS concept at all.. XD
Alright.. then was ISAC debate on women's rights.. ZOMG, I don't even think what I say can do that debate justice.. Suffice to say, it was hilarious, and I've never laughed so much in my life.. FOR ALLAH!! =D
Then let's see, recently the woman has been commenting on how my ego has been ballooning.. and I've figured out why... Steffi keeps praising me.. It's giving me a big head.. hahaha.. I told her this and she decided that everytime she wants to praise me, she'll just insult me instead.. hahaha.. she's super cute luh.. =))
Position papers have started coming in, the English used.. is very x_x I'm dying just reading them.. seriously.. like here's an example:
With financial incompetence, it’s recommended to ASEAN nations that we establish a fund leading by Australia with each member state increasing its budget by little. Instead of a subject that needed to be modified systematically, Australia is willing to equip the comparatively poorer countries with excelling healthcare quality and narcotic skill. The fund will mainly provide monetary support to aspects that are in urge of being funded, for instance the improvement of facilities. In addition, it also helps uplifting awareness of this issue to every ASEAN nations.
I love the "narcotic skill" part.. hahahahahaha.. It's like my fave quote from this paper.. Haiz.. You know people say first impressions count right.. Well, this is my first impression of the delegates and i'm starting to form impressions of the delegates liao.. haha.. They'll have to correct this impression of them when I meet them in person later on!
Alright.. MOVIE MARATHON!! COME WITH ISAC!! hahaha.. Rebecca very cute leh.. XD
hahaha.. alright.. shall update another time.. =))
Struggling with my heart and my head
6:12 PM - Saturday, May 2, 2009
Should I or should I not,
TO BE OR NOT TO BE,
that truly is the question..
ISAC committee positions for 2009 are now open, sad as I am that the seniors are retiring (I think they're awesome and that we can learn so much from them - they're super smart!), right from when I joined ISAC, I knew that I wanted to be involved with the running of the whole thing.
When I first applied for ISAC, I also filled up the form, choosing the roles of Secretary-General and Deputy Secretary-General. Even now, my choice has not changed, once I have fixed my mind on something, unless I'm really really wrong, it won't change.. =/
Now that the time to apply has come, I'm really not sure which post I want. I'm struggling between my
heart and my head..
My HEART tells me to apply for Secretary-General, to have a greater role in the running of ISAC, to be the one changing the direction in which ISAC is going to go, this natural leaning towards leadership positions is something that is innate, something inborn, after all, my name Nicole means leader of the people. I can't fight it, I really love be the one out there ra-ra-ing the people! I aspire to be the same kind of leader in ISAC that I was in Community Service Club, passionate and caring, being the kind of person that my peers could joke around with me and tell me my faults directly to my face without being scared of my reaction. To be the kind of leader where my juniors enjoy talking to me, where they come to me for advice even after I've stepped down.. I genuinely genuinely love ISAC, how could I not? After choosing it over Community Service Club (the first love of my life), with the blessings of Mrs Koh and Ms Tan I might add, I've decided to pour all of my energy into ISAC, and really, even in any position, I think I'll be happy to serve.
My
HEAD tells me to slow down, to not rush into things like I always do, yes people do say to follow your heart, but sometimes.. the head is more important. I have to admit that my grades have naturally suffered due to my overcommitment to my CCAs, its a proven fact.. =/But after my narrowly-making-it-through-to-JC this year, I've made a promise to myself to work really really hard.. No more excuses about how I can't do sciences, now that I'm in a total Arts stream (except for Maths, which I'm actually doing well in) and I've seen results so far.. But I've never truly been tested, and I'm afraid, really really afraid, that if I become Secretary-General and chair ASEAN+ next year, that I will fall back into my old ways of heck-caring schoolwork over my CCA.. =/ I really don't want to live in fear of getting my results back, to cry before getting results because of uncertainty, to have to restart all over again, seeing Alicia and Li Wen has woken me up, no more playing around.. But old habits die hard, can I or can I not do it? How do I reassure my parents? How can I prevent myself from disappointing them for like.. the 6th year in a row? I really don't know if I can do this, but I know I desperately want to..
To Be or Not To Be?
Can someone please tell me the answer... Gods, the dateline for the application is coming soon.. Someone tell me what to do.. Do I follow my heart or do I follow my head?
Haiz... =/